This course becomes more and more interesting after we record our observations on the showing of O’Medea. This is the first time I find writing notes is difficult; it was hard for me to balance my focus and concentration. In the beginning, I tried to write observations from a wider scale but then, I narrowed down my observation in the specific small changes in the movement. It was hard. However, this was helpful for my archiving study. The archiving study is harder than the Judson Church study. Maybe, because I am sticking with my previous ideas that I developed in the Judson Church study. I am trying to go out of the box or get inspired by something that will help me in developing something new or different. However, I feel like it is getting harder but I am trying to manage my thinking. It is really getting more intense and this might because we started to be overloaded with work. However, the studio life of this class made my status to be relaxed. I really loved the idea of archiving, it is helping my creative process. Although, my creative process is circulating as I am trapped with the same thoughts and ideas. However, this circulation helps me to observe the small details and how they can be adjusted or replaced.

Archiving Butoh is a difficult task because it is my first time to archive and when I saw and read Trajal’s archiving for The Return of La Argentina, I got the idea of how archiving works for dancing and movements. It looks so much fun. I am trying to replicate Trajal’s archiving process and ideas but in my own style, I am not stealing his ideas but I am influenced and inspired by his work. I am recognizing that my creative process is slower in this study and I have no idea why this is happening. I believe because whenever I have an idea, I compare to my previous ideas and I conclude that it is the same as the before. I am trapped in this box, however, by observing around, I feel that I am reaching something. I know I am confused but I know I will reach the idea or movement that will make me feel satisfied and happy. It is all a matter of TIME. This study might take longer than the Judson church study but I don’t care about time, I care about the piece.

One last thought, I saw this quote today and it really reminded me of Trajal’s story about his first recognition of performance. The quote says “Our body has a lot of memories and it wants to perform them”-Gio Dust. This quote gave me inspiration and imagination; it gave me clue to how to start thinking on how to choreograph. Thinking about the quote made me question on how to integrate and combine Butoh with my memories which most of it related to my culture and traditions including, the UAE traditional dance, specifically the Bedouin style. I don’t know how will this work but I still in my creative process and I will hopefully experiment in combining or creating different movements which have elements from both Butoh and my memories, UAE traditional dance. Let’s see how will this work in tomorrow. Will it work or not? I don’t know. Let’s wait for it…