Today, my body and mind were challenged immensely through the Second Chance exercise. My biggest takeaway from Fundamentals of Acting was to always follow my impulse, yet this game forced me to reject what I had learned in order to challenge myself. Moving across that floor had never felt so difficult because I was constantly second guessing if the movement I was doing was truly the second thought and not the first. At many points, I felt as though I was following my first idea because it came natural and therefore quicker, so before I could even analyze that it was my first choice, I had already done the move. To truly pick the second choice, I had to slow down and take breaks to think about the next move which I am not used to at all because when I dance nowadays, it just follows the impulse and the music. Today was, therefore, a complete reversal because there was no music we could fixate on and we had to force ourselves to confront why we make the movements we make. What I noticed in my movements was that I often gravitated to the floor as a second thought, since I normally never do this simply because I am not used to it. Looking back at my movements, I can see why this exercise is so helpful; it pushed me to make moves that did not come naturally but were equally valuable. If we do this exercise again, I really want to let go and think about my movements instead of trying to make the movements seem pretty or follow the first impulse because it could me the chance to explore my range of movement.

After Trajal told us to adapt our sequences to the postmodern style, I tried to take what I saw an apply it to the combination mine and Yuki’s sequences made. I noticed how difficult it was to not make phrasings but make each movement with equal emphasis. By doing it myself, I realized how much training and effort goes into postmodern dance. I noticed how my movements, especially for Yuki’s section, were a lot stiffer and linear. Before, I used my arms in a very flowy manner, creating a smooth feel, whereas the postmodern version was a simplified version of this. To me, it seemed as though the postmodern movement went from point A to point B, like the prior version, but without any embellishments. I think that is the closest description to what I felt in my body.

I am particularly curious as to what Trajal’s O Medea will be after I found out that it was only women dancers next to Trajal. Is it going to be a complete gender reversal? How large will the significance of the children be? Will there be a partner who has an affair with another person? If so, what gender are these people? The answers can carry so much meaning depending on what they are. Using Medea as inspiration is interesting source material because it contains so many themes, such as love, despair, loss, death, mourning, and many more. It is a portrayal of some of the most intense human emotions and I look forward to seeing Trajal’s interpretation in his piece. What struck me about the play itself was the double standard for men and women, specifically Jason and Medea. He left her for another woman after she gave up everything for him, and then he is aggravated by her response to the king. I agree that her killing the other woman, the king, and her children, but his actions towards her did provoke, but not justify, the crimes she committed. It was not only him, but also the overall society. In the play, the Nurse often states that she leaves the children on their own, not caring for them, while Jason is literally living with another woman, abandoning his children under the guise of trying to create a better life for them. When she does kill the children, he despises her for taking them away from him, although he left them beforehand. I was just shaking my head while reading the play because of Medea’s fate and how her husband would have had a significantly better life although he acted awfully. It was only because of her actions that he was hurt. She just wanted to make him feel the pain he had made her endure. It was not about the children, it was about pain and suffering.